Tuesday, September 15, 2009

What Works...

I refuse to weigh in on the whole stay-at-home parent versus go-out-to-work debate. When I say "debate" I mean the scary, politically polarized, vitriolic and mean-spirited brawl that surrounds the issue.
I firmly believe that what works best for you works best for your kid, that there really isn't necessarily a better option, there's only a better option for you.
See? No judgment here.

Which is why I'm so pissed off about what happened today,
As we got on the lift the mother of one of the other kids who lives in our building asked me if I was at home with Teddy. I barely had time to nod and didn't get the chance to add that I work from home before she ROLLED HER EYES and said,

"Oh, well good for you, I couldn't do it. I'd die of boredom."

I might be over-reacting here but I was pretty insulted (actually I wanted to punch her in the kidney). We have never even spoken before and I was blindsided by her backhanded snideness. Who says to a complete stranger, "Wow, so you must be really dull or no wait, maybe you're just stupid!?!"

Being a parent is the best unpaid, 24 hour-a-day, manual labour job I've ever had. I've been teeth-grindingly frustrated, infuriated, infatuated, moved to howling fits of tears, had moments of gut clenching terror, laughed my ass off and occasionally felt guilty and overwhelmed. But bored? Not so much.

I wish wish wish that I had sprung a scathing comeback, something like,
"Oh, so your kid is boring? Yeah that must suck".
"Well yeah, I guess it really depends on how good a parent you are "
Hell even,
"Bite me, bitch"
Would have been better than opening and closing my mouth then smiling over gritted teeth and feeling lousy.

I suspect we won't be making any play dates.

The image above is from here, and actually it's attached to a really interesting post.


  1. Hmm, I had an experience like that. I went to get my hair cut, but because it had to be done between errands and the next errand was blackberry picking, I looked very schlumpy.

    The cosmetologist asked if I had kids, I answered yes, a 2.5 yr old and a 6 month old. Then she answered very matter-of-factly, "You're a stay-at-home-mom." Well, yuppers, but what a way to make me feel like crap. She then asked me if I was sending my son to preschool soon, I said no. She said, "Oh, homeschool." I wanted to ask WHY a 3 yr old NEEDED school, but I decided to protect her delicate bubble of a world and just get my hair cut. Sigh.

    OH! And since I'm on the topic, recently my son needed to get an abdominal ultrasound. The tech was looking at his spleen, my son asked what it was. I told him it was his spleen and that it destroyed red blood cells and made new ones to replace them, and that a blood cell lived for 6 weeks, and that his bone marrow made white blood cells.

    The tech then asked, "And what does your mommy do for a living?" My hubby piped up and said, "She's a SAHM." So then the tech said, "Ah, she must watch 'The Magic School Bus'." I love my hubby, he said, "Nope, she reads a lot and is very smart."

    Thanks for letting me vent.

  2. HA! I get that all the time. My son is deaf and we have a MILLION appointments...whenever I'm asked to describe his syndrome I go into smarty-doctor speak ( I DO read afterall!) and I honestly get people asking..."oh, are you in the medical field?" As if mom's can't possibly know what their kid has...
    I always answer.."Nope, even better (and smarter) I'm a mom who gives a dang." :)

  3. I chuckled when I saw this. I HAD to work during my children's growing up years after a bad divorce. But now I get to stay home. The kids are all grown and out on their own, but I have time for the grands. However, what I don't understand is how anyone finds time to go to work every day. I have way too much to do at home to ever be bored.


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